DI OF THE DEAD

Diana: Reaching out once again

Channel 4 - Unrepentantly Daily Mail Baiting

Yesterday: Crash, No-one important died.

A nation groans

Today Channel 4 came clean over claims it was using the grossest form of necromancy and voodoo to lift its flagging public profile. Admitting openly today - Hamish Mykura - head of a meaningless department within Channel 4 - stated that it was:

High time a brave and dark media outlet showed a willingness to even desecrate the dead. Indeed why not? The BBC has been flogging dead horses for years.

The Horror

With that the reanimated corpse of Lady Diana, the Princess of Hearts, Candle in the wind and mine dodger of the third world - tottered on stage.

With a strangled gurgle coming from her emaciated frame the press were astonished at how she had never looked so healthy. Immediately they started snapping images of her in her latest guise. The sudden flashing must have provoked the rage and carnage that ensued, spreading a strange rabid behaviour amongst all those bitten to consume themselves with self loathing.

Dodi Did Di?

With a bloody mess to tidy up Channel 4 admitted it wasn't an original idea to use necromancy to lift a story - as the Conservative party recently tried when it tried to re-animate Grammar Schools and Hitler. But then, who ever accused commercial television of originality?

With clearly no intentions of back tracking or burning the horror they had unleashed on a bored to tears British public they said in their defence

What we don't do is cross the line of showing the dead or the injured. Just a flesh eating corpse that used to be someone well liked about 10 years ago. You could accuse us of baiting Daily Mail readers - but what would be the point? They're c*nts anyway.

One thing is clear to us at the Orion Bag - this sad story will run and run. Well, at least lurch, heave crawl and bite a bit.

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A nation groans

Today Channel 4 came clean over claims it was using the grossest form of necromancy and voodoo to lift its flagging public profile. Admitting openly today - Hamish Mykura - head of a meaningless department within Channel 4 - stated that it was:

Read the full story here

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